Wrestlemania 33 Predictions

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal
The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal will feature just about everyone on the WWE roster who is not already on the pay per view. The Shining Stars, Big Show, Dolph Ziggler, Braun Strowman, Fandango, Curtis Axel, The Uso, Jason Jordan, Chad Gable, Goldust, Sami Zayn, Rhyno, Heath Slater, Apollo Crews, Jinder Mahal, Tyler Breeze, Bo Dallas and several other WWE superstars will battle it out in the ring to win the battle royal. The WWE only lists 24 guys on their website for the match so it’s possible we could see a few surprise entrants like Rusev or someone like NXT like Bobby Roode or Shinsuke Nakamura.

This match is fairly easy to handicap. Any of the guys who are in a tag team aren’t going to win. Fandango, Tyler Breeze, Jason Jordan, Chad Gable, Rhyno, Heath Slater and either of the Shining Stars are not coming out on top. After Baron Corbin won last year as a surprise entrant from NXT I don’t see the WWE doing that again. Dolph Ziggler is a sexy pick but I don’t have any confidence that the WWE will ever do anything with him.

The frontrunners have to Braun Strowman, Big Show or Sami Zayn. With Big Show announcing he is retiring soon and this will be his last Wrestlemania I think that he could win. But Vince McMahon clearly sees money in Strowman and he could use the win after getting pinned by Reigns clean at Fastlane. However, ‘The Underdog from the Underground’ might be the guy who wins since he’s been pushed around by Stephanie McMahon in recent weeks.

I’m calling for an upset and picking Sami Zayn.

Neville vs. Austin Aries for the Cruiserweight Championship

I just don’t see Aries losing at Mania. The WWE has done a great job of building up Neville and I think the title should change hands in Orlando Sunday. But with that being said I think the WWE will change this title switch for down the road since other champs will be losing their belts on the show. Neville retains.

Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Mickie James vs. Naomi vs. Natalya vs. Carmella for the SmackDown Women’s Championship

I don’t see Bliss retaining here. She will be able to feud with whoever wins and be able to say she didn’t lose the belt. I think Mickie James wins and shakes things up setting up feuds with Bliss or Becky Lynch for the next few pay views.

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson vs. Enzo Amore and Big Cass vs. Cesaro and Sheamus in a ladder match for the RAW tag team titles

As much as I like Gallows and Anderson the belts are going to Big Cass and Enzo. The fans are wanting to see Cass and Enzo win and this is the biggest stage to give the biggest babyface tag team the belts. I think Cesaro and Sheamus could implode and start feuding again on RAW Monday night.

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin for the Intercontinental Championship

I really thought Corbin was going to win the title but the more I think about it the way to go is to keep the belt on Ambrose. Every belt can’t change hands at Wrestlemania and all of them could change hands with the exception of Bray Wyatt and Randy Orton. Ambrose needs a win to remain strong heading into the WWE’s new year and that’s why I think he retains.

Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens for the United States Championship

With Chris Jericho going off to pursue music next month the logical pick for this match is Kevin Owens. Owens is going to be around for a long time and the obvious choice to win the match. But, Jericho is going to be around for a few more weeks. I think Jericho gets the win to avenge the betrayal of his former best friend then loses to him in the rematch at Extreme Rules.

I’m could be wrong but I think Jericho wins at Mania.

Fatal 4-Way Elimination match Bayley (c) vs. Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax for the Raw Women’s Championship

This match was set up wrong. Flair should’ve been the champ at Mania and Bayley should have won the title clean in a one on one match. However, the WWE seldom gets things right and now we have four women in the match. One thing I’m sure of, Sasha Banks doesn’t win and I believe she is headed for a heel turn. I think Bayley pins Charlotte after Sasha gets eliminated. Sasha gets mad and distracts Bayley while so Nia Jax can get the pin.

Nia Jax wins and Sasha is a heel.

John Cena and Nikki Bella vs. The Miz and Maryse

If you think Miz and Maryse are going to win I have a bridge I want to sell you. We all know Cena and Nikki will win but the question is whether or not Cena will propose to his long-time girlfriend after the match. It’s a shame this match wasn’t one on one between Cena and Miz.

Cena and Nikki win.

AJ Styles vs. Shane McMahon

Like the Cena tag match if you think Shane wins Sunday you haven’t been watching wrestling very long. AJ Styles is getting a big match on the card but the WWE ran out of big name opponents so they gave him the owner’s son. Styles wins but I bet we see Shane take a big bump off the Wrestlemania entrance that we will see for years to come.

Triple H vs. Seth Rollins

There are a lot of predictable matches on this show. Triple H is going to beat the hell out of Rollins but in the end “The Architect” gets the win. Babyfaces always get their payback at Wrestlemania after a dastardly heel torments them for months.

Seth Rollins wins.

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Title

The WWE is slowly building up Wyatt like the next Undertaker. There’s no value in a Randy Orton win at Wrestlemania. Wyatt is white hot and Vince McMahon should run with him on top of Smackdown. If Orton wins they wasted Cena doing a job to Wyatt two months ago. Odds are Wyatt wins and retains.

Undertaker vs Roman Reigns

Here’s another predictable match. Taker is always dominant at Wrestlemania but he’s on his way out and they need Roman Reigns to get a big win to be taken seriously as the top guy. It looks like Wrestlemania 34 will be headlined by Reigns-Lesnar 2 so they need “The Big Dog” to be THE guy going forward. And what better way to make Reigns than by having him pin “The Dead Man” at Wrestlemania. The crowd will hate it but Reigns beats Undertaker clean.

Brock Lesnar vs Bill Goldberg

There’s no way Goldberg wins at Wrestlemania. He’s only signed for a few dates and rumor has it he’s heading back into retirement. Lesnar has been foiled by Goldberg at every turn and Wrestlemania 33 is when he finally gets his comeuppance. “The Beast” wins the title and pins the WCW legend clean.